HORRIFIC ASSAULT: PASTOR WADEN HARASSES MCDONALD'S EMPLOYEE

In a shocking turn of events, local pastor Waden was observed assaulting a McDonald's employee during a busy shift yesterday afternoon. Eyewitnesses report that the altercation began when Waden became agitated about his order. The McDonald's employee, who remains unnamed, apologized for the inconvenience, but Waden became more aggressive. Witnesse